Kalymos, Greece

A lesson in trying hard

Kalymnos, Greece

After 5 weeks in the magical land of Kalymnos, Greece and I am at last able to share. When I got here, I was near my tipping point and slowly I've let go, sunk into a ritual pattern of climbing, sleeping, socializing and resting. I've also begun to dream again.

After an intense summer of training and exams, I wasnt' sure if I would even want to climb when I arrived here. But the rock has been so seductive and living so good that even the most fatigued could not help but be invigerated.

Before I came, I faintly fantasized about being able to climb 5.12 on this trip. I didn't put much thought into this dream – it seemed like a good number, and one that was sufficiently hard. But I didn't really believe I could do it – so faint was my drive at the time – having invested so much into the guides exams of the past year. On my first day climbing here – the dream seemed utterly unobtainable as I flailed my way up a route of 5.11- on top rope and felt shaky leading 5.10.

Working Priapius in the Grande Grotto.

And yet, in the last week, I've been not only able to red-point a few 5.12's but have managed to climb my personal best red-point of 7b+ (5.12c) and my personal best onsight – two actually - of 7a+(5.12a). So what happened? Aside from the observation that the grades may be soft here, I am still climbing the best of my life.

These numbers only begin to tell the story – since they don't really matter and I am but a moderate climber amidst this world of sport climbers.  However, grades in climbing are in some ways but a useful indicator of how we are doing – something that I use to measure myself against a goal. What I am deeply interested in is how I can take tangible lessons from achieving a goal in climbing and transfer it into my life.

Lilla Molner trying hard & inspiring me to do the same

When I first arrived here – I was fascinated by the truly good climbers who were here for the North Face Climbing Festival. I saw something embodied by these men and women that tickled a dormant spark within me. I saw their passion, discipline, tenacity, deep participation in a community and their capacity for elite performance. I was impressed by not only their physical prowess – but also their emotion control. I was inspired. I was also very humbled.

A few days later, as I continued to bumble my way up the moderate grades here in Kalymnos – I did little research. Thanks google for producing an amazing query to my question: “How to climb hard”. http://gripped.com/2010/12/sections/articles/think-and-climb-hard-the-five-habits-of-successful-climbers/

I've read and re-read this article and here is what I took away. I've been trying to apply this not only to climbing – but also thinking quite a bit about how I can apply this into my larger life.

1.  Do it a lot. They say to excel at something you must do it 10,000 times. For climbing this means 10,000 routes. Whatever the nomenclature – to climb well you have to climb frequently. That is the beauty of this trip is that I've had a chance to focus on climbing. To be good at anything in life – you have to put your time in, be devoted and be committed.

I find this so true in my life at large. If one wants to be exceptional at things they they currently lack the foundation in – then some life restructuring needs to take place. For instance, as I work toward becoming a full ski guide – I must work many many hours as an apprentice ski guide and back-country skier. As I work towards the goal of being calm, happy and fulfilled – I must patiently cultivate the path of abundance, yoga and meditation. Even though I may initially find these pursuits hard.

The famous 'Koala Bear' rest that I mastered.

2. Visualize yourself succeeding. This point is so valuable. I've discovered that if I try a route with an internal voice that doesn't quite see how it will all work out – I almost never succeed. If I instead will the voice of self-belief to be heard – no matter how artificial it may seem – I am far more likely to succeed. I've been developing this skill by visualizing the moves of a route – much as I did as a gymnast.
 

Transferring this skill into life continues to be far more difficult. I've always done well with things I believe I am good at, but never quite realized why. Conversely, I struggle to try things that I think I may fail at to the point that I rarely try them. In climbing this means that I am far better at red-pointing something that on sighting. So I am working at visualizing achieving my larger goals in life and inviting that voice of self-belief to be a little stronger.

Sometimes trying hard hurts

3. Know your weakness and train it. I've intentionally been seeking out my climbing weakness on this trip. For instance – I know I do well on routes that have chimneys, stemming and trad options in them since my skills as a traditional climber shine. Indeed – the hardest climb I did here Tufantastic (7b+) - unfolded for me with a clever knee bar and 3 meters of arm bars. However, I also challenged myself to climb Ivy (7B) & a powerful cruxy 7a+ at Arhi precisely because they forced me to learn new skills.

In life this lesson requires tremendous self-awareness. For to truly challenge your weakness' one must have an hones self dialogue, insightful friends and a way to gauge progress.  This means I've been intentionally seeking out things that I am really bad at, learning to ask for help from others and trying to be more honest about all those little (and big) life failures. 

Having fun while red-pointing a route

4. Have a clear goal – and then set intermediate goals. This point has been critical to me. Rather than getting so caught up in achieving a climb of a certain grade, I made a series of goals that have to do with process. For example, I've set goals of trying to climb more 5.11's onsight, to climb with fluidity and without fear, to fall instead of taking when I do have fear and to develop the skill of falling.

 I also realized that a foundational hallmark of very good climbers was that they always lead. Period. Even on routes that are exceptionally hard for them – they still climb on lead, even if it is bolt to bolt, take huge falls, and might not even make the top. In developing this skill I've learned that I can frequently climb routes bolt to bolt and make the chains. I've also learned that I climb much better on lead and have far more of a sense of satisfaction at putting in my own draws

Transferring this skill into life demands that a larger goal can be broken up into smaller segments and is related to training your weakness. It also demands incredible self-awareness in identifying appropriate process goals that will help me move towards a larger goal. As someone who sets high expectations, a process goal for me is actually giving myself credit for the small victories – which is something I've always found quite challenging.
And - I'm working on 'falling' or putting myself in those situations of possible failure a little bit more.  The fear comes up just as in climbing ... but unfortunately its a little tougher to jump knowing that a trustworthy belayer will catch me!

Cathy and I on the Pirate ferry heading to Telendos

5) Who you spend time with matters. I have been so fortunate on this trip to climb with amazing people – most notably my dear friend Jessie Brown. He inspires me, challenges me and knows exactly how and when to push me. Importanyly, he believed in me when I didn't believe in myself.

I've long known that I climb better with women. Niko, Tami, Lilla and Cathy all belayed me on some of my hardest routes with a gentle encouragement that only another woman could provide. 

In life ... I think I've long known this point and have been so fortunate to have such incredible friends and mentors.  

At the end of my trip ... what matters to me in the end not how hard I climbed, but who I spent time with and what I learned about myself that I can apply back into my life.  Thanks to all the amazing friends with whom I've spent time.  It has been a blast!

A big thanks to Joe Stock and Marc Piche for their photos.  Their photos & blogs can be found at:
http://www.stockalpine.com/posts/kalymnos.html
http://www.marcpichephotography.com/Climbing/Rock-Climbing/Kalymnos-Greece-2012

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Gulkana Glacier GIrls on Ice 2012

July 16 - 25, 2012

 A couple days in Talkeetna enjoying the lowlands, sorting gear and feasting and then it was time for me to move on to the next mountain journey. The slow moving train provided a lovely way to get from Talkeetna to Fairbanks, where I would begin Girls on Ice Alaska. This non-profit organization was created over a decade ago to bring high-school girls into the mountains for a field science and mountaineering adventure. Its always a highlight of my summer. Given that this was the first ever Alaska program – I was even more excited and highly committed to making the trip a huge success.

Emma showing off her garden

Transformed into superstars!

We brought in 7 girls from all over Alaska: Bethel (West coast), Barrow (far North), Hooper Bay (Native village on the W. Coast), Pettersburg, Anchorage, Titalick (small island by Valdez) and Palmer. The remaining girls came from Seattle – one of whom was originally from Nepal and knew one of the climbing sherpas who works for Alpine. Small world. These girls were amazing and I had such a rich experience with them. After a day outfitting

The nunatuk to the right first emerged in the 60'

them in their gear – we drove to the Eastern Alaska Range to a place called the Gulkana Glacier. This Galcier is one of 3 selected in all of the Western mountains of the US that has been studied for the past 30 years by the USGS as part of their ongoing glacier monitoring program. It is also small enough – and safe enough - for us to adequately explore on this trip. Though massive and utterly remote by the standard of the lower 48, the Gulkana is tiny and easily accessible by Alaska standards. It was a perfect venue. 

Flirtatious caribou!

Check out my facebook page for the slide show if you like. A few highlights of the trip include being visited by what we termed 'flirtatious caribou'. Day 3 brought us stunning weather and a family of Caribou curiously checking us out. As we hiked to the upper slopes of an adjacent small mountain to do snow school – they followed! I was utterly distracted by the caribou teasing us as I tried to teach the girls proper ax and climbing technique. After watching the caribous plunge down a steep slope however, teaching the girls to follow suite was no problem. What a treat. We gathered that the caribou were beating the heat and mosquito's by hanging out on the pocket glacier.

Another highlight of the trip was watching the girls deal gracefully with some rugged wet

Taking the girls into the ice fall

Arriving at the A-frame USGS hut

and windy weather. This provided a great opportunity for me to teach them about Types of Fun. Type 1 Fun is typified by fun in the moment. E.g. arriving at a highpoint and being greeted by a stunning view or basking in the sun on a glorious day. It also might be those moments of movement when you feel strong. Type 2 fun can best be described by those many moments that are only fun in hind site. They are not fun in the moment but only emerge so with the filter of a short – selective memory. Type 2 fun moments include those long hard pulls to get to the stunning views, the heavy loads with sore feet, and all the other challenges of mountain travel. Type 3 fun is simply put – never fun. Its reserved for those utterly terrifying moments. We try to avoid these in this program. With a good attitude – potential Type 2 fun moments can just plain be Type 1 fun. Amazingly, these girls pulled off a great ratio of Type 1 fun in the bad weather – singing, laughing and loving the moments. It was impressive.

The mighty suspension bridge

Megamid magic

After our 8 days in the hills we return to the University of Alaska Fairbanks where we have the girls further develop the science experiments they worked on all week and then present them to some of the faculty. They did fabulous. It is such an amazing thing to watch girls from such a wide variety of backgrounds confidently presenting their science projects in a university setting. 
Empowerment is a huge part of this program.  I firmly believe that clarifying one's dreams is the most critical step toward making them happen.  For some of these girls their goals include very normal high school girl things like 'getting out of my tiny town and doing something with my life', or 'not getting pregnant early' or 'spending time with my family'.  We also try to tease out their dreams of going to college, becoming a field scientist or getting into the outdoor profession - and how they might make this happen.  The girls in this program are amazing - and well selected. We choose them precisely because we sense that this program might change their outlook on the world (and themselves).

In another 2 days, I will be starting the Girls on Ice Baker Program – a similar adventure – but with new girls and in the Pacific Northwest.  Should be a blast!

Denali via the West Buttress

June 24th - July 12th, 2012

Afgani fashion on Denali

My recent climb on the flanks of Denali was a great – although the Great One wouldn't even let us get close to her seemingly

elusive summit.  The dance began with a 4 day weather hold in

Plane halo

Talkeetna, hanging at TAT waiting for the 'go' from the pilots. We ended up doing our glacier mountaineering reviews in the parking lot and in the yurt. In the Alaska range, the pilots deliver you into the heart of the mountains. While we don't 'rope up' in the plane, it's pretty much 'game on' once you step off the airstrip. Reviewing roped glacier travel, crevasse rescue and altitude illness prevention helped make sure this team was as ready as we could be. Usually we cover these skills on the mountain - but hey, sometimes the weather makes one go into 'flexibility mode' early.   Fortunately, we managed to stay out of the Fairview – opting for coffees and early night sleeps instead - and the team remained in great spirits.

Valley of death earning its name

   

On the morning of day 4 we boarded the plane at 7 am, landed on the upper upper landing strip.  Conditions remained un-seasonably cool and the heavy winter snows covered the lower glacier beautifully. We started walking right away. Our team made fabulous timing during these days – and the weather and glacier conditions

cooperated beautifully. At ski hill camp -7,800 ft - we were startled at 6am by a massive serac fall that swept across the entirety ofthe NE fork of the Kahiltna, destroying the tracks of our friends - who had been in the valley a mere 8 hours previous en route to the complete West Rib.

11 camp

just below 14 camp

Carry a load, cache it, tromp back down.  Eat, sleep, eat again, break camp, climb higher and set up a new camp.  This was our routine.  9 days later we arrived at the 14,200 base camp in great form – well acclimatized, having brushed up on the big mountain expedition skills, and bonded super well as a team
.

Taking a gamble that the weather would hold, we headed up

Descending the fixed lines

on a carry towards 16,200 up the fixed lines on the 11^th day.   Just below the ridge - chirping birds coasting in the calm air confirmed the lack of winds and we clipped into the fixed lines, making it to the col.  While descending the lines, the rangers passed us on their ascent to 17 and we talked about the imminent re-union in 2 days up at high camp. Unfortunately, this carry would end up being our high point.  Nonetheless, it was the highlight of the entire trip for me and I think also all of the team!

Our previous 'marginal' forecast turned into the 'storm of the season' in the space of a few hours. The series of weak lows joined forces as an occluded front heavy with precip that looked like it would stall overhead.  Damn.  So spooked were the rangers that they descended the next day – and inspired every other team at 17 to do the same. In the end, this storm dropped 3 feet of snow in 12 hours! This snow landed on a horrible surface of Crust / Faceted snow (like sugar crystals) and then Surface Hoar (like dominoes). You don't need to be an avalanche expert to know that this made the hazard unacceptably high.  Walking around camp produced loud cascading Whuuumpphs.  The next night the winds blew strong to extreme and avi hazard only worsened.

Guides recce snow test mission

Patiently, our team waited. And waited. So did all the other teams. Almost all groups on the mountain were guided at this point and all the guides on this route of the mountain were unanimous in our assessment.  We prayed for hot sunny days and for the world to fall apart.  We wanted to see the slopes release - or at least to see some temperature fluctuations that might promote stability.  Instead it stayed cold and partially cloudy.  More snow fell lightly.  As supplies, time and fuel ran low a few of the guided groups made the call to descend the mountain. I joined another Alpine Ascent team with half the clients on the trip and Steve joined another expedition with the remainder of the team. A few other guided expeditions descended with us.

Heading down

Our group took 18.5 hours to descend from 14 camp. Normally it should have taken about 8-10 hours. We encountered rigorous trail breaking (up to my waist in a few places), some careful avi assesment, and then horrible white out navigation. During my leads I grew close to vomiting from a combination of exertion and vertigo – as a recent client might say – I was 'red-lining'! What made this so challenging was the combination of low alaskan night light, milk bottle whiteout - complete with the absolute lack of a horizon, and the variable breakable crust over 30 cm. A few times I would just fall over. Many times I found myself doing a "J" hook in spite of using all my white out naviagation skills and tools.

But we made it to the airstrip and TAT got a plane in to get us as the weather shut down! Gotta love Paul and his pilots. The remainder would end up leaving a few days later – in an equally monumental effort after much more patience than our group - but without a summit either. 

Girls on Ice link in the smithsonian

Every spring, I read through over 110 applications of high school girls from around North America, ages 15-18, who are interested in being part of the Girls on Ice team. We can only take 9. What makes it so hard, is that I feel this program would be amazing for all of these young women. How to choose?

The program takes place on Mt Baker, in the North Cascades in Washington state. Each year our team of 9 teenage girls and 3 instructors spend 11 days exploring and learning about mountain glaciers and the alpine landscape through scientific field studies with professional glaciologists, mountaineers, and some years, artists as well.




Check out these links: the first is an article published about Girls on Ice, published by the Smithsonian
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/girls-ice.html

Here is a prezi you can navigate through:
http://prezi.com/v7uoegcv17q3/girls-on-ice-poster/

Or, to learn more about this unique, FREE, wilderness science education program for high school girls check out Girlsonice.org.

Imagining the Flavell

In 1957 my grandad ran his first river: the Colorado river down the grand canyon. They ran the river in the highest known water levels - 125,000 cfs! vs today's post dam averages of 24,000 cfs. The Glen Canyon dam was built in 1963. It flooded the stunning Glen Canyon and forever altered the experience of running the Grand Canyon. Back then, if you wanted to explore the grand canyon, your options were limited. My Gramps and his buddies ran the river in boats they had to design and build themselves and they relied on very minimal information about the river before they launched.

A few years ago, I had the great pleasure of running my first ever river, also the grand canyon. But unlike my grandad, I was in a virtually indestructible inflatable raft and had Tom Martin, one of the most knowledgeable men of the river, as my personal mentor and coach. He taught me to read the water, set up my approaches, and coached me through every rapid we encountered. Amazingly, I never flipped - though I did bump into a few rocks along the way.

In contrast, when my grandpa and his mentor Pat Riley ran the river, they did not even know if it was possible! Imagine the difference? Today we can choose between guidebooks and I had the privilege of rowing with Tom - one of the authors of the most popular book. My Grandpa and Pat must have sat above a few of the very same rapids that captured my attention - wondering if it was even feasible? My grandpa flipped once and the subsequent 5 mile ride nearly cost him his life. In the end, they would line their boats through a few of the most notorious of rapids.

My dad had the great fortune of running the river with his father in 1959 when he was13 only. He remains the youngest person to have ever rowed the untamed Colorado. This journey changed my dad's life and inspired what evolved into an endless passion with the grand canyon. I have long joked that my dad needs his bi-annual pilgrimage to the grand canyon, where he explores by foot some of the most rarely visited sections of the canyon.

This upcoming Feb, my dad and a few of his friends and I will be running the canyon in replica boats to what my grandpa ran in the late 1950s. They've been patiently and fastidiously rebuilding these boats. We just had a boat building party, where we pieced together delicately cut sections of wood to replicate the Flavell, the boat my grandpa built. We also brought the replica Susie R to water for the first time and she performed beautifully! Fun, fast, responsive and damn attractive.

The fly fisherman on the Yakima river whistled in awe as we floated by. It made me proud of grandpa to have built these boats 50 years ago and to have had the balls to take them down the wild Colorado river. And, it made me even more proud of my dad and his friend Ian Elliot, for having patiently built these replicas and for giving me this opportunity.

Remembering Wad

I've been asked to write about a trip I did years ago with Katy Holm and Karen McNeil to Mt Waddington. I'd love feedback ... so if you are keen I can send it for an edit?

Writing this article has been a great opportunity to remember a trip I shared years ago. Katy and I are now dear friends and tragically, Karen disappeared in Alaska.

Memory is amazing ... the more you think about a trip and review old images, the more details enrich the entire thing!

Post - exam Purgatory

Much of the last year of my life has been focused on successfully completing my Assistant Guides Exam with the ACMG. This consisted of moving to Canmore, training ice climbing in -30C temps and completing an ice climbing course. Then, a trip to the sierra with las chicas and later, more training in the Canadian Rockies ahead of what ended up being a super fun summer alpine guiding course. Do I even need to mention .... training in the exam venues? The culmination of the courses was a recent 10 day exam conducted in the Coast Mountains of BC in the Joffre and Tantalus Mountains.

As part of the revered Canadian tradition of certifying guides, the examiners scrutinize our every move for the 10 days, providing coaching and daily de-briefs of our performance. Fortunately our examiners were able to balance professionalism with irreverence and kept things safe, productive and dare I say, at times even fun.

Then, the examiners spend up to 3 weeks mulling over our performance on categories such as technical systems, risk management, professionalism and route finding. Yeah sure, its good to pause and process how we've done for a wee while ... but 3 weeks is a long time to find out how we've done officially.

In this time, we candidates rest, recover and wait. Of course, all my friends and family know how important this is - so they ask how it went .... but I can't really say, and I certainly can't move on to the next phase in my life till I know.

Hence my reference to post-exam purgatory. I did a little research on this concept - thanks wiki. "Purgatory is the condition or process of purification or temporary punishment in which the souls of those who die in a state of grace are made ready for Heaven."